Hey - I Know That Dead Guy

CATEGORY: Autopsy, Field Trip, Friends

DIVISION: Modern Evil

EDITORIAL: Stunned at seeing a fellow classmate on the slab during your latest visit to the Medical Examiner's Office? Shock and/or disappointment at the cadaver selection for your Autopsy Tour is now a thing of the past with Modern Evil's new online booking service - The PostMortem Party Planner. Secure a stiff of your choice, select a time and even choose from the wonderful a la carte options of meals, drinks and music. Like a Ticketmaster for Death, The PostMortem Party Planner makes your Medical Examiner's Office visit a day you'll never forget.















School Autopsy Tours Canceled

Maureen Feighan / The Detroit News

WATERFORD -- For the first time in nearly a decade, the Oakland County Medical Examiner's Office isn't offering public school tours this year after a bizarre coincidence this past spring in which a high school group from Waterford watched the autopsy of a 14-year-old girl from the same district.

Oakland County officials said they decided to stop the tours after they were contacted by the girl's parents, who found out about the tour from a student on it and were very upset. Tours are still available for paramedics, police cadets and more career-oriented groups.

Mike Zehnder, the county's director of public services, acknowledges it was "a poor decision" to let the tour go on given the circumstances. But the medical examiner had no legal obligation to contact the girl's parents or keep the autopsy private.

"It was just an unfortunate situation," Zehnder said. "... It was a very popular learning experience (the school tours), but given the human side of this, they were discontinued. I know how I would've felt" as a parent.

Each August, Bob Gerds' phone would ring so incessantly he couldn't keep up with it. One high school science teacher after another would call, hoping to claim a coveted spot to tour the medical examiner's office, which Gerds oversees, and watch an autopsy. By mid-August, tour slots for the entire school year were often filled.

Gerds said he told the teacher who brought the Waterford Kettering High School group in March that the autopsy they'd be observing was of a Waterford middle school student but she said it was OK to proceed.

"She said it was fine," Gerds said. "I told the students that if any of them knew this girl, they should not go back there."

Rhonda Lessel, a Waterford School District spokeswoman, said the teacher talked to her class beforehand and asked whether the group wanted to continue. The class was made up of mostly 12th-graders with some 11th-graders.

None of the students knew the girl, who had committed suicide, but one did know the girl's brother, according to a parent whose child was not on the tour.

"I believe the teacher did what she thought was in the best interest of the students," Lessel said. Lessel said the teacher was not disciplined.

Watching an autopsy -- where attendants open the deceased's chest and skull so a doctor can examine each organ, including the brain, to determine a cause of death -- could be traumatic for a young person, especially if he or she knew the deceased, said Z. Wendy Karougian-Moore, a psychotherapist from Southfield.

Depending on his or her background, "it might be like post-traumatic stress disorder," Karougian-Moore said. "...They could experience nightmares."

For nearly a decade, a trip to the Oakland County Medical Examiner's office was one of the hottest field trips in town for high school biology and forensic science classes. Drawn in part by television shows like "CSI," more than 2,500 people a year used to the tour Oakland's facilities.

Oakland County, which has a glass observation and platform attached to its examining room so tour groups can observe autopsies, was one of the last counties in Michigan to allow high school group tours.

The Wayne County Medical Examiner's office discontinued its school tours a couple years ago because students weren't taking them seriously, said Chief Investigator Albert Samuels. Macomb County lets high school groups tour its building but not watch autopsies.

"We were finding out that a lot of the (high school) students were treating it like a trip to the planetarium," Samuels said.

Before the March incident, Waterford Schools had routinely sent groups to Oakland's medical examiner's office to witness autopsies as part of a class curriculum, Lessel said.

"It extended learning beyond the classroom," she said.

Robin McGregor's daughter, Alex, who graduated this past spring from Waterford Kettering, was supposed to be part of the tour in March from Kettering's CSI, or crime scene investigation, class. She didn't end up going because she was out of state picking up a scholarship.

"From a parent's perspective, if that was my child, I'd be upset," said McGregor, the former president of the PTA, which did later discuss the incident with its members so parents were aware of it. "But my daughter wants to be a doctor so she'll have to see stuff like this. The kids have learned a lot of good things from seeing these autopsies in the past."

Zehnder said he's gotten complaints from roughly a dozen teachers, disappointed the tours have been discontinued.

"It is a shame, but it was a decision that was made and we have no plans to change it," he said.

Why Isn't Patrick Swayze Near Death?

CATEGORY: Death, Movie Star, Over

DIVISION: Modern Evil

COMMENT: If there's any out-of-date Hollywood Movie Star that should be near death, its Patrick Swayze [at number 4 on the list of: 1. Macaulay Culkin, 2. Rob Schneider, 3. Pauly Shore]. So why isn't he? He's got pancreatic cancer. He made lousy movies. And nobody cares that he has pancreatic cancer. Really, death would be the best move for his comeback.












Patrick Swayze Denies Reports He is Near Death

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - "Dirty Dancing" star Patrick Swayze, who has pancreatic cancer, on Tuesday denied tabloid stories that he is near death.

Swayze, 56, said in a statement he was home with his family for the holidays after finishing work on his new television series "The Beast."

"The only thorn in my side being that many tabloids have been consistently reporting lies and false information about me and those close to me," Swayze said.

Lately, he said, "they're reporting that I'm on my last legs and saying goodbye to my tearful family."

The National Enquirer has reported Swayze's cancer spread to his liver. The Globe, another tabloid, placed the actor's photo on its cover with the headline "Swayze Deathbed Secret!"

Tabloid reports said Swayze had only weeks to live when the actor revealed in March he had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Since then, he has started work on the FBI drama "The Beast".

"Pancreatic cancer is an aggressive disease and from the moment I was diagnosed, I knew I was in for the fight of my life," Swayze told People magazine.

"It's a battle, and so far, I've been winning. I'm one of the lucky few that responds well to treatment."

The Texas-born Swayze has starred in dozens of film, TV and stage roles. But he is best known for playing dance instructor Johnny Castle in the 1987 film "Dirty Dancing."

Monsters in Court

CATEGORY: Bullying, Monsters, Struggle

DIVISION: Modern Evil

EDITORIAL: Bullies are the common monsters of daily life, and a vital metaphor for our personal journeys. But the truth about our conquering quests, as Hollywood movies confirm time and again, is that the victories are few while the defeats are many. Casualties from monster battles litter the landscape. So what to do in defeat? Litigate, of course!













MySpace Bullying Led to Teenage Suicide, Court Hears

By The Guardian

A teenage girl hanged herself after being taunted by messages on her MySpace account, an American court has heard, in a case that could have wide-reaching ramifications for social networking websites.

Prosecutors say Megan Meier, 13, from Missouri, killed herself after receiving nasty messages that she believed had come from a teenage boy but had actually been written by Lori Drew, 49.

The trial is being billed as America's first cyber-bullying prosecution and a potential precedent for punishing online harassment.

In his opening statement to jurors in Los Angeles, the prosecutor, Thomas O'Brien, said Drew, her daughter and an employee of Drew's "hatched a plot to prey on the psyche" of a girl she knew was "vulnerable, suicidal and boy-crazy".

The court heard that Drew posed as a teenage boy named Josh Evans on MySpace and exchanged messages with Megan.

"Her purpose was to tease Megan Meier, to tease her, to humiliate her and to hurt her," O'Brien said. "One of her plans was to print out the conversations and take it to Megan's school and let people make fun of this depressed 13-year-old girl."

Megan's mother, Tina Meier, told the court that late in 2006 she found her daughter "sitting at the computer crying" after getting into an online dispute with "Josh Evans" and a couple of girls.

"She said, 'They're saying mean, horrible things about me,'" Tina Meier testified. "I told her to get off (MySpace)."

Less than an hour later she found her daughter hanged in the closet. Megan had struggled for years with depression and school bullying.

O'Brien told the court that after Megan received a message saying the world would be better off without her, she sent a response saying: "You are the kind of boy a girl would kill herself over."

Drew's defence lawyer, Dean Steward, told jurors his client did not violate the Computer Use and Fraud Act, used in the past to address computer hacking, and reminded them Drew was not facing charges dealing with the suicide.

"This is not a homicide case," he said.

Drew has pleaded not guilty to one count of conspiracy and three counts of accessing computers without authorisation. Each count carries a potential sentence of five years in prison.

"I Checked to See If He was a Little Bit Alive"

CATEGORY: Murder, 8-year-old, Family

DIVISION: Modern Evil

EDITORIAL: A young and very real 'Michael Myers in the making' describes matter-of-factly finding his dead dad, who he murdered, after school - and a nation is shocked. We're just surprised that he's the only elementary-aged killer out there. Maybe there could be more like him with freer access to guns earlier in the child development cycle.















8 Year Old Murder Suspect will be Released from Custody with Restrictions

By Dan Marries/KOLD News 13

The eyes of the country are focused on the small town of St. John, Arizona. Home to 3,500 people, residents remain in shock two weeks after an 8 year old boy allegedly shot and killed his dad and another man. On Wednesday, Nov. 19th under heavy security, the boy was in Apache County Superior Court where a judge granted him a two day release.

Prior to the hearing deputies used a blanket to shield the boy as he was shuffled into court. What was expected to be a half hour hearing ended up lasting more than two hours. Reporter Donna Rossi from our sister station in Phoenix was in the courtroom, "we saw him walk in and he had a long sleeve blue shirt and dark pants. He looks like a 8 year old that's the bottom line, however, something looked completely out of place, he had on leg shackles and you could hear them shuffling as he walked to the defense table."

Over the objection of prosecutors, the judge will allow the boy to be released from a juvenile detention facility for two days so he can spend Thanksgiving with his mom but there are stipulations as explained by Betty Smith Apache County Superior Court Administrator, " there's to be no cable TV, no video games were included in those limits he placed." The judge also ordered there to be no knives or guns in the house.

A lot was said about the release of the video by the Apache County Attorney's Office on November 18th in which police questioned the boy for an hour. The judge ordered no more video or audio will be given to the media. From now on it will only be transcripts released. Rossi says the boy was fidgety during today's hearing, playing with his face and putting his arm around his mom at times, "at one point, he turned to some of the people in the front row who walked into the courtroom with his mother and he smiled at them, not a huge smile and then he mouthed the words, 'love you."

How Much Peanut Butter to Cover a Dead Body

CATEGORY: Murder, Peanut Butter, Condiments

DIVISION: Modern Evil

NOTE: Corporeal condiments vary depending on whether a body is living or not. Popular live body spices include chocolate, cinnamon or cloves, while dead bodies do better with a lye-based rub [to quicken degradation]. Slathering your murder victim with peanut butter is a new one for us though - but duly noted, we will put it to the test in our labs.












MURDERER'S GOOEY PEANUT BUTTER PLOY

By REUVEN BLAU and ERIN CALABRESE

Slain Long Island teacher Leah Walsh's allegedly homicidal husband slathered peanut butter on her body before dumping her in a ditch in the hope that wild animals would get rid of the evidence, sources told The Post.

The heinous revelation comes as waitress Donna Lepore, 24, admitted she had an affair with Walsh's husband, William Walsh.

When Leah's naked body was discovered Oct. 29, say Nassau County law-enforcement and medical-examiner sources, she was slathered in peanut butter.

The grisly method of disposal was only partially effective, said sources. The corpse was found by a worker from the North Hills Country Club in a wooded area about 50 feet from the westbound Long Island Expressway.

Detectives are looking into whether accused killer William had help in preparing the body for disposal and dumping it, a source said.

Cops say William, 29, confessed to strangling his wife during a 3 a.m. fight Oct. 26 over his infidelities. He dumped her body, set things up to appear like she had been abducted, and made emotional pleas for her return, investigators said.

Lepore, a steakhouse waitress, says she had an affair with William but broke things off a year ago.

"Just because I had a past with him doesn't mean I know anything," she told The Post.

Party Like It's the End of the World

CATEGORY: Crisis, Drill, Death, Party

DIVISION: Modern Evil

EDITORIAL: While Californians practice what to do in an earthquake to survive, we would also encourage them to practice what to do if they don't survive or know they're going to be dead soon. Going out in style is making the best of a bad situation. And in that west-coast spirit, Earthquake Parties are the next natural evolution in tragedy preparedness. Having a solid plan for your demise is just good living.





















Ready, Set, Shake: California Puts on Quake Drill

LOS ANGELES — Californians dropped to the ground, covered their heads and held onto the furniture Thursday for a mock "Big One" - an earthquake drill billed as the largest in U.S. history and aimed at testing everyone from state leaders to students who donned fake blood to play victim.

At exactly 10 a.m., television news programs announced there was an earthquake disaster drill, then cut to cameras in school classrooms showing children ducking under their desks and holding onto them. After about a minute, the drill moved into aftermath mode, with people portraying quake victims.

The exercise was based on a hypothetical magnitude-7.8 temblor that ruptures the southern San Andreas Fault _ an event that scientists call the feared "Big One." Such a quake would cause 1,800 deaths and $200 billion in damage, researchers estimate.

Local governments, emergency responders, schools, hospitals, churches, businesses and residents were taking part. Organizers said some 5 million people had signed up to participate.

"We're trying to make it a communal event," U.S. Geological Survey seismologist Lucy Jones, who helped create the crisis scenario, said before the event.

The minimum participation calls for people to dive for safety. Firefighters and other emergency responders are staging full-scale exercises complete with search-and-rescue missions and medical triaging of people posing as casualty victims.

Shortly before the fake quake struck, students at Bishop Alemany High School in the Mission Hills area lined up to receive makeup that would turn them into simulated quake victims.

Something Goes Wrong - Crichton Arrives in Hell

CATEGORY: Michael Crichton, Death, Hell

DIVISION: Modern Evil

NOTE: Just like the scenarios in every one of his novels/movies/TV shows, something has gone horribly wrong in the recent passing of Michael Crichton. Our reports confirm that instead of resting in peace, Mr.Crichton has instead arrived in Hell and is desperately trying to escape. We're not sure how this one will end - but we urge him to avoid the velociraptors.












Michael Crichton, Dead at 66

Author Michael Crichton has died at age 66 after "a private battle with cancer." Crichton's career was probably one of a kind: After training as a doctor at Harvard and working as a fellow at the Jonas Salk Institute, he became a bestselling author, then a successful screenwriter, award-winning movie director and TV producer. The move "Jurassic Park," based on his book and on which he shared screenwriting credit, is the No. 10 top grossing film of all time.

Crichton first reached the bestseller lists in 1969 with his book "The Andromeda Strain." "This book recounts the five-day history of a major American scientific crisis," the acknowledgments page begins. It seems to chronicle an actual event, including "real" scientific documents and transcribed communications of a crisis of Earth's contamination by an extraterrestrial microorganism.

A man with binoculars. That is how it began: with a man standing by the side of the road, on a crest overlooking a small Arizona town, on a winter night.

Lieutenant Roger Shawn must have found the binoculars difficult. The metal would be cold, and he would be clumsy in his fur parka and heavy gloves. His breath, hissing out into the moonlit air, would have fogged the lenses. He would be forced to pause to wipe them frequently, using a stubby gloved finger.

He could not have known the futility of this action. Binoculars were worthless to see into that town and uncover its secrets. He would have been astonished to learn that the men who finally succeed used instruments a million times more powerful than binoculars.

There is something sad, foolish, and human in the image of Shawn leaning against a boulder, propping his arms on it, and holding the binoculars to his eyes. Though cumbersome, the binoculars would at least feel comfortable and familiar in his hands. It would be one of the last familiar sensations before his death.

In my 1970 Dell paperback, that's the end of Page 1. Pow! He sets the reader up, gets you right into Shawn's place in that cold night, holding binoculars and leaning on that boulder, then he kills him. All at once you want to know more: What killed him? What happened? Who's telling this story, and how does he know all this? And as he gets these questions going, he implies to the reader that they're like Shawn in another way: This book is going to feel unfamiliar. But the storytelling voice has enough confidence (the storyteller survived, and knows all) that you're reassured that you're in good hands.

Crichton liked to put his characters in a scientifically manipulated peril. He did it again in the film "Westworld," in which lifelike human robots in an amusement park run amok. In "Jurassic Park" too; there, re-vivified dinosaurs in an amusement park run amok. Then there was "Congo," in which scientists on an expedition are attacked by strange gorillas; "Prey," in which nanotechnology goes wrong; and "Next," in which genetic engineering goes wrong.

In 2004, Crichton stirred controversy by questioning global warming in his book "State of Fear" and making statements such as "I'm saying that environmental organizations are fomenting false fears in order to promote agendas and make money."

Going Out In Style

CATEGORY: Coffins, Death, Burial

DIVISION: Modern Evil Products

NOTE: You can't choose when you go, but you can certainly choose your style. Cliche'd coffins just won't do. Africans are customizing their final resting places - Why not you?!

Coming Soon - The Custom Coffin Service from Modern Evil.











Coffins From Ghana

For the Ga tribe in coastal Ghana, funerals are a time of mourning, but also of celebration. The Ga people believe that when their loved ones die, they move on into another life -- and the Ga make sure they do so in style. They honor their dead with brightly colored coffins that celebrate the way they lived.

The coffins are designed to represent an aspect of the dead person's life -- such as a car if they were a driver, a fish if their livelihood was the sea -- or a sewing machine for a seamstress. They might also symbolize a vice -- such as a bottle of beer or a cigarette.

Ablade Glover, an artist who works with the carpenters, says the coffin acts as a home in the afterlife, so it must be beautiful. But he laments that after putting so much time into creating the coffin, it gets hidden underground.

"By the end of the day, they are going to bury this thing, which has taken so much time, so much energy?" he says.